The Pecking Order: A Bold New Look at How Family and Society Determine Who We Become Paperback – April 12, 2005

An abundance of scientific study validate the empirical evidence presented in this book. It should be required reading for young adults who need to do some planning before starting their own families. Readers will better understand the dynamics of the families they grew up in and the family they may possibly be raising. I read this during my first pregnancy and still love this book.

So true and the reasons why some make it and some don't. Birth Order has a huge impact and circumstances that people have no control over.

In this book the author makes a really good attempt to explain how lifes events determine who we become. He uses really good examples and makes the book easy to read however he never specifically states his position on what he believes influences our outcome in life. There are a lot of "guesses" and statements about how we can never be sure that had 1 small event not happened that things wouldn't be different.I personally feel like I knew that prior to reading the book, that any one thing can change your entire lifes path. I was looking for the author to make a theory and prove it, or lead in one direction. I respect that he did not pretend to have the answer but I think this book missed the mark on what I was looking for. I will say however that the examples of how different siblings are and how they were raised and the changes within the families during certain stages of life did help me to form my own theory on how society and family influence who we ultimately become.

The premise of this book really draws you in, especially if you've read anything on the subject of family dynamics and development. There are some very interesting observations on, and in some cases contradictions of, popular ideas. I definitely found myself considering my own childhood, and I can certainly see how this book would stir the mind of parents. Unfortunately, I was left wanting. There are very few actual conclusions made by the author despite the numerous anecdotes used to (supposedly) present his arguments.

If you want to understand what is going on with your family and friends, read this book.

I can't say that this book doesn't have it's merits, because it does. The author is making a very good point that a lot of different factors lead to which siblings and why become more successful. (and as a side note that IS what this book is about. The title is a bit misleading. More than anything the author is concerned with which siblings succeed and which fail mostly in an economic sense. He does spend some time on more personal failures and success stories, but mostly he's concerned with "financial" success which gives this book a disappointingly narrow scope) The problem is...who doesn't already know that a myriad of factors shape personal development within a family? This book essentially drags on and on, presenting anecdote after anecdote of circumstances that alter siblings directions that could have easily been presented in list form in a simple pamphlet. It would have been one thing if the author would have provided more in depth research to back up his anecdotal interviews, but instead he normally just provides another anecdote as "evidence." The end result is a book of circumstantial circumstances that amounts to little more than what we already know: If you talk to a bunch of different families, they all turn out kids who run significantly different courses. All Conley does is present examples for what type of factors may or may not alter their course. And some of his examples are painfully obvious....like siblings who went to Vietnam who struggled after returning to the states. I think we're all aware of the struggles returning GI's encountered after Vietnam.My biggest complaint with this book is I couldn't shake this feeling of smugness that was being presented by the author, that he had done all this research to refute birth order theory. I've never met the guy personally and it's silly to assume he's one way or another, but I felt like I was being lectured by a professor with a big ego throughout the book. When really his arguments, although delivered with intensity didn't carry much weight.If you're looking for a birth order book I'd suggest looking else where. This book barely touches on birth order in the sense of personality development (which is what I believe most people are looking for when they pick up a book like this), and doesn't present much other than chaos theory when it comes to discussing "how family and society shape who we become." But for those who are looking to get something out of this book, let me tell you the two main things I will take away from this book (which is why I'll let it slide with 2 stars) The one main thing I did get out of this book is money makes a big difference because families with money have more resources to put into their families. No shocker there, but he makes some interesting points about the role money plays in sibling development that were worth reading. The second point is that birth order really doesn't make a difference in small families, but in big families birth order can make a big difference especially for the middle children who are squeezed for attention and resources. If either of those two points interest you....for a penny, this book might be worth picking up.

Incredibly fascinating.

Save your money.

Nature Nurture論争について社会科学者が書いた本．この手の本は行動遺伝学とか進化心理学についてすべて遺伝子決定論を主張するものと(誤解して)決め付け，それについてイデオロギチックな批判に終始する場合が多いらしいのだが，本書はそうではなく社会科学者から見た真実が主張されている，そういう意味では良心的な本である．本書の特徴は厚みのあるリサーチを読者に提示するためにアネクドータルな手法を中心に据えており，固有名詞のついた家族や兄弟の逸話がこれでもかこれでもかと語られる．そしてその中に真実を浮き彫りにしようという手法である．読み物としては面白い．(ただ逆に定量的な主張に欠けていて，客観的にはどうかという感じは残る)主張の中身は常識的なもの．人の運命(本書では特に現代アメリカにおける経済的な成功に的を絞っている)は単一の要因で決まるものではない．特に遺伝子や生まれの順序のみで決まるわけではない．現代アメリカの成功不成功の分布の4/3は兄弟における差で説明できる．つまり文化社会的な影響，ジェンダーにかかるまわりの環境，家族の歴史，そしてそれらからくるリソースの配分に大きく左右されるというもの．(要するに心理や生まれ順以外のリソースが重要ということで進化心理学やハリスの生まれ順説を批判しているということらしい，そもそも誰も単一要因を主張しているわけではないので批判にはなっていないが，複雑な真実を見るには非常に重要な観点をわかりやすく提示しているといえる)この逸話を積み重ねる手法の効果でいろいろ詳細が面白い．どういうケースで何が起こると誰が影響を受けるかがいろいろと語られる．たとえば兄弟の数が多いとどうしても親の配分する資源に限りが出て誰かがマイナスの影響を受けることになりやすい．誰が貧乏くじをひくかはさまざまだが一般的に下から2番目あたりが厳しいらしい．親が成功していけば後から生まれたほうがいいし，零落していったり．離婚するのならば下の子には厳しい．親族の世話をするのは女性のロールモデルという場合には娘には負担が押し付けられやすい．専業主婦の娘はキャリア的には成功しにくくなる．などなど．最後に著者自身の兄弟とのライバルの歴史，現在進行中の離婚と子供達への心配が語られほろっとさせられる，