9 Must-Have Conversations for a Doubt-Free Wedding Day
T**Y
Whoa.
I was on vacation when I decided to go through this as a devotional/workbook. I am not currently in a dating or courtship relationship, but I would (and have already) recommend this book to any couple that is.It helps you look at yourself and take stock of what's there. What you will bring into a relationship - both good and bad. I read the "Sacred Search" book in a little less than two days, but this book will (and should) take you much longer as you process and write down your thoughts. Honestly, it made me think about and face things about myself that I didn't even realize needed to be worked through...but now that I'm on the other side of that, I'm so very thankful I read this book.You will get out of this book only what you put into it. I have the digital version and my kindle is FULL of notes because I journaled directly into it. Sometimes after a session with this book, I actually felt drained and took a nap...but it's scripturally sound and I highly recommend it for any young couple looking at the possibility of marriage. Likewise, I also recommend it for singles to look at and use as a tool to "take stock" of what's there and what their makeup is and so forth. Singles note: If you read the "Sacred Search", it's not hard to figure out at least a "straw" figure of the kind of person you're attracted to, you can work from there. In the event of entering into an actual relationship, you would want to update that.. but for the purpose of getting through this book at times, it may be necessary for you.NO, it's not easy stuff. It's not fluff and used properly as a tool, this book will not leave you unchanged. Some of it even hurts, not gonna lie. Straight out of high school, I wouldn't have even DREAMED of going through a book like this. The language is simple, but the message isn't always easy. Parts of it seem as if the author is against you and not for you - but by the end, I was thankful and grateful I went through it. An odd way to spend a vacation, perhaps, but it was certainly time well spent.Note (I don't want any confusion here): I didn't have an actual partner to struggle/work with as I went, so I can't really comment on how THAT experience would go. The authors believe in being entirely thorough.
G**E
Essential book for Anyone Following Jesus and considering marriage!
I have read both this book The Sacred Search Couple's Conversation Guide and its companion book The Sacred Search. If you are a truly committed follower of Christ and you want to make a Biblical decision regarding a potential marriage partner, this book is essential! If used with a prayerful and open spirit and - if possible - an Awesome, professional Christian Counselor like Dr. Steve Wilke, this book will help you have the tough conversations every couple should have BEFORE they get married (or, rather, ENGAGED) so that you do not make a mistake in this lifetime decision. These conversations are difficult to have but imperative to vetting your potential marriage partner and determining if this person has the same life and spiritual goals and desire to follow God as you do. I only wish I had this book prior to my (failed) marriage. Before I marry again, this book and process will be a required commitment of my 'potential' prior to considering a marriage relationship. Anyone who is not willing to do this work prior to engagement and marriage, probably should not get married. Marriage is an option, not a requirement. we should each make sure that if we are exercising this option, we are honoring God and following Him in our decision making process. This book will help you to do this. Make sure you pick up two sets - one for you and one for your potential marriage partner!
B**Y
Superb book full of solid premarital principles. Read *before* dating!
We provided this book to our 17 year old son, who was pursuing a relationship that we were certain would not serve him well in the long run. It took a while to get his attention, but he finally broke off the relationship when he started to see her clearly. We believe it's made a good difference in his outlook for finding a spouse. We have decided to use this book (and related materials) for an upcoming class for our church; we are completely convinced that it will save our teens a lot of grief and instead give them practical tools to identify and identify relationship pitfalls.I believe there are a few key points to take away.- Get your head in the game before your heart- Recognize the signs, symptoms, and dangers of infatuation- Consider whether the other person is likely to help you fulfill the Lord's intentions for you- There really isn't "the one", your "soulmate"; the Lord gives us a choice of who to marry- Instead pursue a "sole mate" - someone willing to put their shoe leather to walking out your purpose in life with you- Always remember the sacred purpose of marriage; it's not just about sex or companionship
J**N
A Boost of Confidence
This was excellent. My boyfriend and I have been talking much more seriously about marriage, and went through this book together. We would read the chapters outloud, answer the questions on our own, then compare. We got some great discussion out of it, including some things we hadn't considered. Even though we were both nervous to begin with, we both understood that it would be better to hash things out now, before getting engaged, instead of later down the line.Also, there's very little fear-mongering in this book, which we both appreciated (we're paranoid enough on our own). We get it, marriage is hard. I think some pre-marital books are a bit heavy handed on that side of things. Not this one! It's very candid, but accessible.Further, the authors really have a knack for asking questions in such a way that you may actually answer them honestly ;) For example, they ask "If someone was concerned about your relationship, what might they say (whether or not you would agree)?" It's very clever writing, and got us both to open up and be honest with ourselves and each other.
R**D
Great tool to mentor young unmarrieds who think of getting married
An amazing tool to mentor young couples who are thinking about getting married. Do not use it for pre-marital counselling as it would be too late to use that book. What I like about this book is that it helps the couple who thinks of getting married to think through some very important things about marriage. If you would like to mentor a young couple (as husband and wife) this is a great tool to use. This is from a Christian perspective and heavily leans on biblical principles.
L**H
Excellent book for pre-engagement couples
My significant other and I were pleasantly surprised with how timely this book was with the issues we were working through and it was a great book to work through alongside our per-marital counselling sessions. It also helped us to have some tough conversations to ensure we were on the same page for things that could cause marital conflict (such as how to manage our finances). Highly recommended for other pre-engagement couples.
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