Guards! Guards!: Discworld, Book 8

I hope Death is taking good care of Sir Terry Pratchett, because when he comes to take me to the other side, I’d like to kiss Sir Terry on the mouth. Because I’m in love.I don’t think words like clever, witty, cynical, hilarious, dark, wise, and gut-busting-funny really do justice to his writing, but it’s kind of all of those combined and you get this amazing writing that is both funny, clever, and underneath it all incredibly dark and somewhat sobering. But how else do you point out to people all that is wrong with humanity? No one wants to hear what’s wrong with humanity unless they want to become a deeply depressed, chain smoking, alcoholics. So you do it the only way that will get people to listen: you disguise it as a joke. So that people can laugh, sigh, and say “that clever bastard” and go on with their day without thinking of drowning themselves in a bottle of gin.I’ve been holding off on starting Terry Pratchett’s works for years because the collection is so massive and apparently you don’t start with book 1. After hearing about his passing, however, I knew I just had to do it. Since there are several viable starting points, after some consideration and research, I decided to start with The City Watch collection, as it is lauded as one of the funniest and best books in the collection.The book is about the city of Ankh Morpork and it’s Watch. “The city wasa, wasa, wasa wossname. Thing. Woman. That’s what it was. Woman. Roaring, ancient, centuries old. Strung you along, let you fall in thingy, love, then kicked you inna, inna, thingy. Thingy, in your mouth. Tongue. Tonsils. Teeth. That’s what it, she, did. She wasa … thing, you know, lady dog. Puppy. Hen. Bitch. And then you hated her and, and just when you thought you’d got her, it, out of your whatever, then she opened her great booming rotten heart to you, caught you off bal, bal, bal, thing. Ance. Yeah. Thassit. Never knew where where you stood. Lay. Only one thing you were sure of, you couldn’t let her go. Because, because she was yours, all you had, even in her gutters…”If you take a city and turn it upside down, put criminals in charge, and the “respectable” folk at the bottom you’ll have something vaguely resembling Ankh Morpork. Cover it in trash, alcohol, and feces and you’ll be much closer.Like any true fantasy this book has it’s heroes, it’s tyrants, it’s would-be-kings trying to beat the tyrants, secret societies, magical books and artifacts, and of course, last, but never the least: dragons.We go to the gutter to find our anti-hero Sam Vimes, Captain of the Night Watch, a depressed alcoholic brought low by a woman. The woman in this case is Ankh Morpork herself, his true love, his city. Our other hero is Carrot, a six foot Dwarf who may not be a Dwarf after all do to human genetics, in possession of the most non-magical sword in existence. And of course, Srg. Colon and Srg. Nobbs. Oh, and the Librarian mon— beg pardon, Ape. Who may have been a man once. They are all brilliant, lovable, and while slightly cowardly, ready to stand behind their Captain.Then there is of course Lord Havelock Vetinari, who is the city’s ruler, a tyrant who you probably actually don’t mind having in charge, since he’s not very tyrannical, but a very effective ruler. He demands greats respect and you have to give it him, because if you didn’t he’d send men to come and take it away.It takes a threat to the city, to the livelihood of all it’s criminal citizens, to get the good Captain out of his drunken malaise and turn him into the cynical, brooding, anti-hero his city needs, but never knew it wanted. That threat, of course, is a dragon, for what other creature could disturb a city that is already run by organized crime.But a dragon is only a dragon after all, and it will do what a dragon will do. That is, hoard anything shinny, set things on fire, and demand a human snack to appease its hunger.Full of puns, wordplay, and humorous cynicism this book would give Monty Python a run for its money, all while showing just how petty some powerful people can be, and how heroic some pathetic people may turn out to be. It a one in a million chance, but it just might work.The question is: Are you feeling lucky, punk?

I love most of this series. This book is one of the best, introducing the Night Watch, Dragons, and the functioning corruption of Ankh Morpok. The Patrician is also introduced, but he will change for the better in future books.Happy reading!

What do I see when I first open this page and go to the review section to write a review? Why, a picture of a bent cover. And what do you know, that is my complaint also. Kind of a bummer to shell out the money for a brand new book, get all excited, and the cover is bent. It's not a huge deal - I mean, it doesn't alter the stellar content - but still, it is excessively irksome.Hey, Amazon! Pay your workers a little more and quit working them like slaves and maybe they'll have the time to take a bit more care with the stuff we've ordered! Oh, and give them time to go to the bathroom as well. No good giving them a 10 minute bathroom break if the bathroom is a 15 minute walk away!Anyway....to the book.This is the first Pratchett book I ever read, and I instantly fell in love with the Night Watch. Oh Carrot, you are so awesome! I also fell in love with Vetinari. Man, that guy is scary. Anyway. Fabulous book! Brilliantly written! Absolutely hilarious! Just So. Dang. Funny. And insightful. Also, did I mention, well written? And engaging? You should definitely purchase and read this book. It's his best one. Of course, my husband would disagree. His favourite is Feet of Clay. Also Going Postal. But seriously, Coroporal Carrot is where it's at. Oh Carrot. <3 <3 <3Anyway!!! My son has been instructed by his school to bring in a book for independent reading. I managed to get him to pick this book, not Feet of Clay. Muhahahhahaa! It's a delight to introduce him to the Disc and Ankh-Morpork. The poor kid's going to get sick of me saying, "What did you read today? Where are you in the book?" =D Might have to nick it off him and read it again myself. Where did *my* copy go anyway? I can't find it anywhere. Huh.

A wonder of unexpected transformations. Important Secrets. Interspecies cooperation. Dragons!!!!!! I always loved dragons but now I think I know them better.

Best author ever!

For some reason there where pieces of cardboard glued to the book. it took me almost on hour to remove it, ending up with scuffs in the printing and sticky glue remains where the cardboard was. This breaks my heart.Awesome book though.

Author has great sense of humour.

Book was in amazing condition, good packing.Looking forward to read the book.

Troisième exemplaire acheté, pour en offrir et faire découvrir l'un des meilleurs auteurs qui soient.