Between You & Me: Confessions of a Comma Queen

This is a delightful book if you can get used to the large print, unless you are one of those who are helped by it. Alternatively, get the audio version read out by the author. This is not just a rule book about how and when to use a comma although it does that in the more subtle and interesting way. Norris (I would have written ‘Miss Norris’, but she disliked being described as a lady) tells of her early life and working as a milkman (she dislikes that term too) and moving to New York and being completely entranced by the word ‘synecdoche’ and her curiosity after reading Taggart’s book, ‘Between You and I’ while waiting for a free parking lot. It is such a joy to read this book because, between you and me, it reads more like a biography than a grammar book. She tells of the envy she had for her brother Dee who had privileges as a boy, and how, after years of wanting to be like him, he decided to change his sex. There is a chapter on ‘Between you and me’ of course, and every chapter is full of humour – some of the humour starts with the chapter heading, for instance, ‘Who put the hyphen in Moby-Dick?’ Fun to read anywhere – even while waiting for a parking lot.

Mary Noris, copy editor for the New Yorker, has written a wonderfully informative book, Between You and Me: Confessions of a Comma Queen. The author makes grammar fun, yet each chapter holds a wealth of memorable tips.Noris talks about her early days at the New Yorker and the painful lessons she’s learned through her years at America’s premier literary magazine. She has mastered the art of fixing something without draining the sentence of its character.Chapter by chapter Noris talks about the difference between this and that, which and that, dangling participles, often giving hints about how to figure out the correct word. She goes into some detail about the predicament of having no common-sex singular for he, she, or it. She suggests that we might adopt s/he, he/she or even heesh. She suggests that when wondering which pronouns to use when saying something like between you and me, reverse the pronouns. Between I and you just wouldn’t sound right. Then there’s that pesky who and whom. She covers it all.I laughed right out loud when the author discusses the serial comma, the comma before “and” in a series. She believes in retaining the comma for fear a sentence will come out as it did in this example: “And there was the country-and-western singer who ‘was joined by his two ex-wives, Kris Kristofferson and Waylon Jennings.’”Many of Noris’ comments are based on the “New Yorker style.” The magazine, of course, has many dictionaries and reference books. But, as the author says, “The dictionary is a wonderful thing, but you can’t let it push you around.” Use common sense.The book covers almost any question of punctuation imaginable: the comma, dash, semicolon, colon, exclamation point (which she calls a screamer), and the en and em dashes (which have no spaces before and after).Between You and Me is a rather short book, with the last thirty percent of it taken with Acknowledgments, Notes (from each chapter), Appendix and Index.I loved Between You and Me. It’s charming and witty, and I learned a lot along the way.

I have to say I didn't spot a rollick anywhere, nor did I find it jaw-dropping, gob-smacking hilarious, or otherwise over the top in any category - except whatever quality it takes to make one glad to have read it, grateful to Ms Norris for having written it, and envious of anyone who has had the good fortune to spend time with her in the flesh (so to speak). The book's part memoir of girlhood in Cleveland, part memoir of work at The New Yorker, part grammar and punctuation screed, all with a very big helping of good humor and often questionable taste (in the bowdlerian sense). I challenge anyone not to smile all the way through the section about profanity, and was delighted to see Carlin's seven dirty words in print, even though not in the same order that I remember them, but why quibble. Ms. Norris no doubt researched them and my recollection is awry.My sole caveat is that I nearly skipped over some of the bits about commas. It would take a face-to-face conversation for her to make those interesting to me. Great fun for word nerds, grammar geeks, fans of The New Yorker (the book could have done with a great deal more of NYer lore but ...) and lovers of good writing. Highly recommended.

I personally am engaged in quite a bit of editing scientific texts; a task that has a slightly different flavor (the "in-house rules" are the SI conventions laid down by the various scientific academies and primarily the BIPM -- Bureau International des Poids et Mesures (SI maintenance agency) -- which, please note, the New Yorker does not always consistently apply in articles with engineering or scientific content. Of course, her and other editors at the New Yorker have a host of other challenges: how to resolve disagreements about grammar and spelling and punctuation and ... with poets and other literati. Reading about how she learned to and how she now deals with these problems is the substance of the text.The book is of great value, because it describes how, although a language may be and is in flux, some logical consistencies must remain enforced, even as times change. (I wonder whether Ms. Norris would let this sentence construct pass.)But the value of the book extends beyond that. Parties in a population that have an agenda adhere to the paradigm that changing the rules of language will change the political outlook of the users of the language. Not that we have any historical evidence that this paradigm was ever successful; Nonetheless, it still goes on. (Read her chapter about when to use "he" and/or "she".) Irrespective of the historical evidence, editors in serious publications must deal with the political forces exerted and arguments presented by adherents to these paradigms. Chapters dealing with these editorial issues, even if you may not agree with the tenets of the paradigms, are not only an enjoyable read, but an insightful and educational one.Which is why I heartily recommend this book.Would The New Yorker allow me to use "which" in this construct?Would it allow this construct?;-)One cautious note: some technical terms are not defined and may not be known to the reader (as has happened to me). In line with the context of the text, this is fine, but don't be upset.

This is a delightful book if you can get used to the large print, unless you are one of those who are helped by it. This is not just a rule book about how and when to use a comma although it does that in the more subtle and interesting way. Norris (I would have written ‘Miss Norris’, but she disliked being described as a lady) tells of her early life and working as a milkman (she dislikes that term too) and moving to New York and being completely entranced by the word ‘synecdoche’ and her curiosity after reading Taggart’s book, ‘Between You and I’ while waiting for a free parking lot. It is such a joy to read this book because, between you and me, it reads more like a biography than a grammar book. She tells of the envy she had for her brother Dee who had privileges as a boy, and how, after years of wanting to be like him, he decided to change his sex. There is a chapter on ‘Between you and me’ of course, and every chapter is full of humour – some of the humour starts with the chapter heading, for instance, ‘Who put the hyphen in Moby-Dick?’ Fun to read anywhere – even while waiting for a parking lot.

Of course one doesn't agree with everything Mary Norris says, and occasionally she talks complete nonsense, as in her absurd suggestion that the OED is "not a practical reference book." That said, it is still the case that Between You and Me is wonderful: always interesting, sometimes hilarious and occasionally moving. How totally I identify with Norris's impatience at the antics of the autocorrect!-- "why would I let a machine tell me what I want to say?" Why indeed? How I am moved by her experience of the word "synecdoche" as John McFee used it in writing about Alaska! "I cannot explain the effect this word had on me, except to say that it made me ecstatic. I was like that cartoon dog who, when given a biscuit, hugs himself and levitates." This is what it is to love language. As for punctuation--I do believe I agree with every single thing Norris says. Thus, "People are tempted to use both a question mark and an exclamation point, but this is a bad idea." Indeed it is. Very bad! Here a confession--I was brought up to sneer at dashes, but have always personally rather liked them. It has felt like having a disreputable friend whom everyone else disapproved of. So what joy to find that Mary Norris likes dashes too! As for the semi-colon--"There is no mark of punctuation so upper-crust as the semi-colon." As soon as I read that, I knew that Ms Norris must be my friend forever.

I read first a truly hilarious French book on a similar subject (Au Bonheur Des Fautes) written by a copy editor for Le Monde newspaper. I thought I ought to read an English couterpart, and read "Eats Shoots and Leaves" which was not very entertaining. This current book, on US-English grammar, is much more fun and will make you learn some finer points of the English language with a smile. It also gives you an insight on the background work that goes on before the publication of a serious magazine. It's slightly long, especially at the end, this is why I gave it 4 stars.

Mary Norris is a grammarian. The reason some find her "snobbish" is because few of us, not even communication professionals, have ever diagrammed sentences or routinely use standard English. Have you listened to the news lately? We are told that there are less GOP candidates running for the nomination given the loss of Bush et. al. The only way LESS candidates can be possible is if each and every one of them, including Chris Christie, lost weight.