Memoirs of an Addicted Brain: A Neuroscientist Examines his Former Life on Drugs

This is a brilliant recollection of an addict. The fact that he kept journals and was deeply introspective helped bring his past to life. His ability to parse the variety of experiences helped this drug novice understand the differences among the many substances that he ingested and injected.But as a neuroscientist hobbyist (if there is such a thing), what most appealed was Lewis’s background in the brain science of addiction. He explains the role of dopamine, glutamate, serotonin and the cocktail of other chemicals which drugs stimulate and suppress. He’s able to explain what areas of the brain are affected and how that translates to sensation. And through his extensive personal and professional experience he is able to flesh out the fully rounded hell that is addiction.Lewis granted me a window to much better understand those I’ve worked and lived with. I strongly recommend this read to anyone who wants a more complete view.

As a recovering opiate addict who's been through the same gamut of mind-altering substances as the author, I found this book incredibly insightful and true-to-life. The descriptions of various drug states are dead-on, enlivened by exacting neurological commentary. I don't know if I've read another book that described the feeling of certain highs so skillfully as to almost give me a placebo myself. Beyond this, though, the book is simply riveting as a narrative. The beginning portions detailing the author's teenage depression and alienation bring my own unpleasant memories flooding back, as do parts of the section on psychedelics in Berkeley, when Lewis was still caught up in that idealistic, wanting-to-belong teenage mindset he describes so incisively. Heroin comes and splits the book in two, and this is where it begins to get particularly fascinating. As a recovering addict there's somehow something perversely thrilling and reassuring, perhaps, about reading another addict's horror stories as they descend into single-minded compulsion. Though I never quite reached the legal/moral lows the author did, I still can relate one hundred percent because I know that it wouldn't have taken a lot to make me descend further into the void. The last quarter or so of the book as Lewis recounts his increasingly reckless break-ins to steal drugs which he will later inject no mater what, is incredibly entertaining for being so dark. Perhaps it's because I've been there too, in a way. But I've re-read the second half of this excellent book a good 3-4 times and I continue to find the whole thing consistently interesting and funny and sad and, above all, truthful. It strikes just the right balance between scientific commentary and personal musings, and semi-accidentally captures, with vivid detail, what it really feels like to be a moody teenager and a lost twenty-something better than most books which are solely focused on that aspect. Highly recommended.

Dr. Marc Lewis masterfully incorporated engaging textbook style neurobiological explanations behind addiction within his "Memoirs of an Addicted Brain." Each chapter is a rich anecdote describing a different phase of Lewis' life, accompanied by the introduction of a new cause of addiction for most of the book. He explains his emotions and thought processes leading up to, during, and after each new high. After a new drug is introduced, he not only describes the pharmacological effects but also explains basic anatomy of the brain and what the processing or physiology of the particular receptor, neurotransmitter, or structure of interest would be under normal conditions.The feel and structure of this book is an unusual and remarkable combination of explanations from both a raconteur and college lecturer. It is extraordinary and unique because Lewis is both neuroscientist and drug addict in the book. He is able to provide valuable insight that could usually be lost in translation between experimenter and lab rat. Lewis guides us through the neurology behind addiction as he reveals his first encounter with underage drinking, his temporary escape from depression via dextromethophan, sexual desires, and his experimentation with psychedelics, PCP, and eventually heroin and more. Though not an addict yet, in the first chapter, Lewis jumped straight to expressing the insecurity and curiosity that led first to drinking alcohol. He noticed a change in mood and his self-criticism finally being silenced. He switches from raconteur to college lecturer mode when he begins describing how alcohol is affecting his system by enhancing GABA transmission, which means "the inhibitory chemicals get boosted," and muffling glutamate transmission, meaning "the excitatory chemicals get hushed." His explanations are thoroughly detailed, and he provides just enough background information about brain structures and functions for the less informed readers. He emphasizes physiological effects as well as the emotion state and external situations surrounding addiction. For Lewis, he battled a constant "ache for acceptance" and a deep depression that he learned to dull with chemical substances, partially leading him to conclude that "addiction is really just a corrupted form of learning."Even as Lewis falls down a path of crime and deceit, he manages to describe the chemical mechanisms. He recalls as an undergraduate working in a laboratory how he considered stealing morphine from an old lab fridge and then explains the part of his brain that deals with this ethical battle: "the dorsal anterior cingulated cortex is where context and judgment come together to create the will, that beam of self-direction that makes it possible to choose consciously and act morally." Here, we can see that he does not stop with just illustrating the effects of drugs while an addict is actively abusing them. Lewis goes into further detail and describes various structures and functions of the brain and ties them back to an addict's thought process, choices, and acts.When I first took a look at this book, I had expected to learn about drug addiction in the strictest sense, but various aspects and types of addiction are covered in this novel. Lewis describes mental and emotional addiction early in his memoirs when he relays his first encounter with dextromethorphan, illustrating how "people take drugs because they're not feeling right [and] the whole point of taking drugs is to change the way you feel." He illustrates the wanting and craving of an addict through descriptions of sexual desire with the neurological culprit revealed to be neuromodulator, dopamine: "with every letter she wrote me, the dopamine pump got activated." Lewis also managed to connect and compare various types of addiction throughout this book. He did so sometimes by comparing emotional states, such as explaining how his "attitude toward LSD, a drug, was not much different from [his] zeal to connect with Lisa, a girl, thanks to a flood of dopamine in [his] ventral striatum - wanting and wanting and wanting..." Other comparisons and connections simply illustrated similar biological mechanisms, such as describing PCP as `an NMDA antagonist, like dextromethorphan and ketamine."Readers of any background can easily understand the scientific descriptions, but the explanations are still detailed enough to not feel too simplistic. He discusses major neuroscience topics such as functions of varying sections of the brain and the roles of neuromodulators and other natural chemicals of the central nervous system while exploring neuropharmacology of substance abuse drugs. Cellular biologists, however, may not be satisfied with the level of detail in this book. Lewis focuses more on the emotional and cognitive aspects of addiction rather than the major underlying molecular mechanisms behind it. Though not extensive, Lewis does provide some information on current research and external resources in the endnotes for readers who wish to be more informed. For those interested in more complex detail, one would have to resort to textbooks or journal articles (as is the case for any scientific research). This book is not a series of case studies. It's a memoir, so high level of detail of biological pathways and mechanisms is not to be expected. The neuroscience discussed is examined with enough detail to satisfy introductory neuroscience students but explained clearly enough for anyone to understand. Ultimately, his descriptions smoothly connected neuroanatomy, basic neurophysiology, and perception.One more note I will make is I would have liked to see more on the effects of drug addiction over time. Lewis went into sufficient detail on changes in perceptions and basic physiological pathways but provided less detail on long term effects.Overall, I enjoyed this book. It is effective and engaging, and I would definitely recommend anyone to read it. Lewis brought the understanding of addiction passed the level of recovering addicts revealing their history and cautionary tales and brought to life the biological mechanisms behind the addiction. This memoir illustrates an enthralling life story and delivers a successful merging of the mental, emotional, social, physical, and molecular aspects of addiction. The tales are heartbreaking, sometimes horrifying, and sometimes extreme, wild, and often foolish, but Lewis, a flawed but inspirational man, ultimately leaves the readers with a happy ending from a cautionary tale. His straightforward, simple, and engaging explanations of various neurological concepts will help anyone understand a little more about how our brains work. Though unfortunate, terrifying, and tragic at times, Lewis' rich history with substance abuse and addiction as well as his current knowledge and expertise of neuroscience truly made it a fascinating read.

Fantastic book. From brief other things I've read about the author, I might not agree with all of his beliefs about addiction. But this is by far one of the best explanations of how it feels to be addicted, he then attaches what physically is happening in the brain. It is amazing. A must read. Xoxo. Good luck and all the promises are true.

Recommended by a colleague to help understand a loved one. Very insightful for multiple relationships and parenting. Highly recommend

Great great great insights and description of how I felt about drugs. And a great end that can give hope. I'm trying NA and Smart right now. I'm very grateful for this book and the next to is biology of desire, from same author.

Marc Lewis verpackt die Neurobiologie der (Drogen-)Abhängigkeit in eine ergreifende, nachvollziehbare persönliche Geschichte in Form einer Autobiographie. Wissenschaft in Romanform, spannend, lesbar auch für "Normalsterbliche" und trotzdem auch ein Sachbuch, das mehr Informationen transportiert als übliche Fachliteratur.

This is an honest first-person account of the life of an addict but with a great message of hope toward the end: addiction can be overcome, even if urges and cravings still persist and bother you to a lesser degree. Highly recommendable.

A friend of mine recommended this book to me, and I'm so glad he did. The format of this book, where the author describes his personal experience, and then breaks down the neuroscience of the drug, in each chapter, was deeply engaging. I loved reading about the ups and downs of Marc Lewis' life, while also getting a solid insight into why drugs affect people the way they do. I would never have picked this book up on my own, but it's become a favourite!

Recommandé par l'American Academy of Neurology, ce livre nous fait vivre le recto et verso des drogues: le vécu de l'auteur pour chacune des grandes classes de drogues et les modes d'action sur le cerveau avec apparition progressive de l'addiction, de ses mécanismes biochimiques et de la chute finale. Ce livre écrit dans un langage simple mais en anglais, permet de comprendre les modifications comportementales des drogués et surtout qu'il n'y a pas de drogues ''soft''. Toutes sont (potentiellement) dangereuses.