When I Was Puerto Rican: A Memoir (A Merloyd Lawrence Book)

As described.

In "If You Want To Write," Brenda Ueland defines the third dimension in writing. There are the two dimensions of the page, and the third dimension is the soul of the writer coming through in the writing. Ueland writes:"...behind the words and the sentences there is this deep, important, moving thing - the personality of the writer. And whatever the personality is, it will shine through the writing and make it notable or great, or touching or cold or niggardly or supercilious or whatever the writer is...If the Third Dimension has something fine in it, it will shine through the inept, dull words as through glass."Esmeralda Santiago's Third Dimension has something fine in it.I didn't really engage with the book until halfway through it. I'm not Puerto Rican. I've been to Brazil several times, but never into a "favela," and her story of growing up poor in rural Puerto Rico gave me some insights of what life in a Brazilian favela must have been like. But, let's face it, how interesting can the life of a shy little girl be?During the first half the book, I kept thinking to myself: It's like Seinfeld. It's a book about nothing! I wondered if I'd even finish it. But, inexplicably, I kept coming back to it, and it was because her Third Dimension hooked me. You either have it or you don't.The second half of the book was like a plane taking off. The story got more interesting as she got older, and the Third Dimension increased as she asserted herself in the world.I found her move to NYC particularly interesting, especially her observations of the coldness of American culture compared to her culture. I see this difference clearly in Brazil vs. America. The expression "calor humano" (human warmth) in Brazilian Portuguese doesn't exist in English because it doesn't exist in Anglo/American culture.The book ends on a high note, which made it worthwhile.So comparing the story to a plane taking off, I'd say for the first half the plane is just waiting at the gate. Umm, are we going anywhere? was the recurring question in my mind. On page 128, the plane started backing out of the gate. As the second half progressed the plane headed down the runway, increased its velocity and took off (the ending).I'd say the book is more literary art than a captivating story. It has a calm vibe, reflective of a time when life was simpler and people were simpler. And it's a nice vibe to bathe in. It takes you out of this modern, hectic world.I'm writing a memoir myself and I appreciated how much work went into this book. I don't think I'd ever be able to give a book one star and berate it like many people do on Amazon. Such people have never attempted to write. It's not easy!Final point: The Amazon copy I bought has a great feel to it. The paper used for the cover is very smooth. It just feels good holding this book, and that added to the nice "energy" of it.I want to read her follow-up memoir "My Turkish Lover" next, because I found the author more interesting the older she got.

One of the most difficult challenges facing a memoirist is the task of making her particular story resonate with universal truths. Esmeralda Santiago's "When I Was Puerto Rican" is a stunning success; it not only captures the dynamics of identity creation, does so in the context of ethnic, class and geographic tensions. Santiago's coming-of-age saga encompasses an incipient awareness of her unique status as an oldest daughter, conflicted thinker and anguished observer of family disintegration. That she writes without a drop of self-pity is remarkable given the abundance of sadness and betrayal which swirl in her story.For much of her childhood in Puerto Rico and her early adolescence in New York City, Santiago lives a dual life. Possessed of a "stubborn pride," her "frightened self hid" behind a false veneer of acceptance that "everything was all right." At once proud and ashamed of her rural "jibaro" identity, Santiago grapples with exactly who and what she is. In this respect, "When I Was Puerto Rican" reverberates with the near-universal dynamic of identity creation, hidden shame at life's circumstances and constant questioning of how and why families created such tortured environments in which children evolve.Plaguing Santiago is the ambiguous, tormented relationship between her mother and father. Exposed equally to the sounds of lovemaking and arguments, Santiago can neither be surprised that her parents never wed or the constant absence of her hard-working, poetic but irresponsible father. Eventually, the pressures of this quasi-marital status between Mami and Papi erupt, and Santiago saves her best writing for its description. As her mother and father savage each other in verbal warfare, "they growled words that made no sense." Their fighting echoes "all the hurts and insults, the dinners gone to waste, the women, the abandonments." As Santiago "crouched against the wall," she witnesses her parents "disfigure" themselves with anger. "In their passion Mami and Papi had forgotten" their children. They were real "only to one another." Santiago and her siblings cower in a corner, "afraid that if we left them, they might eat each other."This authentic voice carries throughout the memoir as the author explores the various influences of her own existence. Nicknamed "Negi" by her parents due to her dark complexion, Santiago is acutely aware of her ethnicity and is perplexed upon her move to New York that people who look like her (African-Americans) have deep, unfounded suspicions about her and her people. As a Puerto Rican, she develops ambivalence about the United States and the American presence not only on her native island, but in her heart as well. How American will she become? At what cost? These are the same questions millions of immigrants have asked themselves as they immerse themselves in their new land. But how can she be "new" when Puerto Rico is and has been America for all of her life.Though "When I Was Puerto Rican" treats Esmeralda Santiago's life during the 1950s and 1960s, it has a timeless feel to it. Moving, illuminating and compelling, this memoir does much more than describe one girl's emerging self; it invites us to explore our own past and examine the forces which have created our own identity.

I can’t say enough about how good this is!! It is very well worth the time! Glad my book club chose this one.

This is a great book to have. I must for a puertorrican, you can see a true story of how puertorrican live on the island. Esmeralda plasma muy bien la cultura de Puerto Rico 🇵🇷 en diferentes épocas. Luv it !!!

Fact or fiction? Memory is always deceptive - especially when life brings success.There are many discrepances and repetitions padding out this rags to riches life story. But the book reads well.